Wednesday, February 18, 2004

today= worst day of my life but im hopin it will all turn out ok she says it will i jus hope she realises that i love her so much and she means alot to me and i hope she realises that i mean a lot to her and she needs to be with me im goign to appoligize ahead of time  if i act a mess and im not myself i jus dont think anyone understood me when it old them that she meant alot ot me and maybe its right because she needs to straighten her life out and i am gunan be here for her no matter what even if i still love her and she doesnt love me and before i asked her out i told my self no ur not gunan get hurt u like her alot its only right but now that shes gone i cant help to think about if we ever will get back together but i cant be mad im doing the right thing right  im letting her get her life together so shes happy and maybe in the end she will wanna be with me i knwo she does now but its hard to think that i wont be with her i am a mess right now but i need to get thru it i cant let her get away unless its right in her  and i need to show her that i love her by letting her do that  and still be there for her i hope we are doign the right thing and hopefully shes happy i think sooner or later  ill be happy too its just hard to think that knowing shes gone and may not ever be in my life again......... i love her i dont know what to do